Pain-Free Ways to Stop Being a Pushover at Work

Pain-Free Ways to Stop Being a Pushover at WorkPain-Free Ways to Stop Being a Pushover at WorkHave you realized that, somewhere along the way, youve become the person who will say yes to just about anything? Do you take on new projects regardless of whether or not you have the bandwidth or if the work is even appropriate for your role? Are you struggling to break the cycle without offending your boss or co-workers? Its natural to want to be considerate of others at work and take on extra projects in the name of going the extra mile to show your commitment to your job. But this eagerness to please can quickly go too far. While at first it may have seemed like doing it all and volunteering to take on more responsibiity will prove your worth, in the end accepting each and every request can seriously compromise not just the quality of your work, but also your happiness and satisfaction. Fact is, your pushover tendencies can leave you feeling resentful toward your colleagues and just plai n burned out. If youre constantly working, the likelihood youre devoting any time to personal upkeep (like getting to the gym or catching up with friends) is low, and the quality of your work, not to mention your mood, can suffer greatly. Entrepreneurs see this, too By focusing so much on growing their business, they soon find themselves victims of scope creep- saying yes to every new client demand and projects so much that it surpasses their bandwidth to provide good service.So, whether youre running a business or running on low at the office, how do you recover? How exactly can you begin shedding your pushover ways and learn to be more assertive and protective of your schedule?Fundamentally, its about learning to better set and manage relationship boundaries and flexing your self-respect muscle. Here are some steps to take.1. Uncover the Roots of Your Pushover WaysIn order to be your best, fruchtwein productive self, you must protect your top essential priorities from those that a re mentally and emotionally draining. Start by identifying the passive habits you have that are incrementally eating away at your focus and control. Think about your average day How much time do you spend simply reacting to other peoples demands? For example, do you drop everything the moment an schmelzglas comes in from your boss to respond to it? Now, take it a step further and see if you can figure out the true reason why youre triggered to automatically say yes. For example, are you yearning for more responsibility, hoping that your enthusiasm will get you noticed, rather than confronting your boss directly about a promotion? Do you take on extra projects because you crave recognition? Or, if there is an office clique, do you want to feel included and more like part of the crew? Recognizing what youre dealing with is the first step to helping you identify and manage trouble situations in the future. Related 31 Things You Should Know About Yourself2. Create a To-Dont ListSet asi de time at the beginning of your day (or whenever you feel least distracted) to take stock of your responsibilities. For each to-do item, ask yourself What will I accomplish or learn from this? How will it help me advance? Now, as you scan your list, be bullish about moving anything that does not align with your top priorities to a to-dont list. For example, if increasing revenue by 10% in the next quarter is your top priority, dont agree to take on a pro bono project right now to diversify. If youre looking to gain experience managing juniorchefin employees, anything non-essential that takes time away from working directly with your reports should be on your to-dont list. Related Crazy To-Do List? What to Tackle First3. Enlist HelpAre you delegating as much as you could be? Ambitious self-starters often get caught up on multiple projects, but if you dont start passing off certain tasks now, it will only overwhelm you when it becomes too much. Start with anything that comes across your desk thats on your to-dont list and see if theres someone who may be better suited to take it on. No one to delegate to? Then perhaps an overflowing workload is a sign that its time to talk to your boss about expanding the team and hiring someone who has the skills to pick up some of the work. Related The Right Way to Ask for Help at Work4. Practice What You Preach- in the MomentThis is the hardest part, because saying no to others demands can feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar at first. But its also the most important. Next time youre asked to take on a project that falls outside the boundaries youve identified, you need to say no and stick to it. Not the next time it happens, not most of the time, but right now. If its something youre struggling to say no to- say, a request from your manager- ask questions and look for ways to compromise. For example, if your boss asks you to work on a Saturday when youd planned to go visit your parents, first try to understand why he may w ant the project done ASAP. If youre not sure, ask. Then, when sticking to your boundaries, make the explanation about the business, not about you. Do recommend an alternative for how the project can be completed (for example, Saturday wont work, but I will clear my schedule on Monday morning because I understand why you want this completed early in the week). Youre still showing value and dedication- but youre also maintaining your sanity. Related How to Tell Your Boss No Without Saying NoWhile it might be difficult to say no and stick to it initially, practicing assertiveness based on the priorities youve identified and commitment to delegating when appropriate will not only help you shed your reputation as the office pushover, but it will improve the quality of your life. Building a successful business or career takes a lot of self-respect and requires having a thick skin and knowing when to say no. Start with these steps, and youll be on your way to building a reputation based o n the quality of your work, not the quantity you take on.Photo of woman at work courtesy of Shutterstock.